April Book

 Unortho­dox is a mem­oir by Deb­o­rah Feld­man, a for­mer mem­ber of the Sat­mar com­mu­ni­ty in Brook­lyn. Feld­man describes the deeply reli­gious envi­ron­ment in which she grew up, closed off from the rest of soci­ety and kept from any type of sec­u­lar edu­ca­tion and upbring­ing. Raised by her grand­par­ents after being aban­doned by her moth­er (who leaves Sat­mar and is no longer reli­gious) and her men­tal­ly unsta­ble father, Feld­man attends Sat­mar schools, where only Yid­dish is spo­ken and read­ing books in Eng­lish is for­bid­den. She writes about her secret trips to the pub­lic library, hid­ing books under her mat­tress and hop­ing her grand­fa­ther doesn’t find out. She describes her regret for lack­ing the ​“enlight­en­ment” felt by the oth­er girls in her school and com­mu­ni­ty, and her strug­gles from a young age with the feel­ing that this life isn’t for her. She is mar­ried off at sev­en­teen to a man she meets once, and that’s when her rebel­lion begins. She learns to dri­ve, grows out her once-shaved hair and attends Sarah Lawrence Col­lege. After a car acci­dent almost kills her, Feld­man real­izes what is most impor­tant to her. She leaves her hus­band, takes her son, and starts a new life with­out the wigs, heavy clothes, and reli­gious restrictions.

In gen­er­al I have issues with authors who self-pro­claim their sto­ries as ​“scan­dalous.” In the Sat­mar world, what Feld­man did was scan­dalous, but her sto­ry did­n’t pro­vide the dra­ma and intrigue it seemed to have promised. How­ev­er, it does pro­vide a win­dow into a world not many of us know about or can fath­om. Her sto­ry, slow at first, invites us into the homes and mind­sets of the Sat­mar peo­ple, at times whole­some and warm and at oth­ers lone­ly, shock­ing, and dis­turb­ing. Feld­man is reflec­tive, nev­er minc­ing words, say­ing exact­ly how she feels about every­thing. For a woman with lit­tle for­mal sec­u­lar edu­ca­tion, her writ­ing is elo­quent and stirring.